Peaceful Tarbiya- Self Regulation: WHY?

“Why can’t he/she just behave!” we hear ourselves saying that quite often, right?

Our children are going to act like children, after all, they are still learning, growing, they have different priorities than us and can’t always manage their emotions and actions. As parents, we should be able to manage our own emotions and actions and that is what allows us to be peaceful. Parenting is not about what our children do but it is about how we respond. Numerous studies have shown that parents who respond with love, respect and set boundaries by guiding; raise amazing kids.

Children are born pure, Our Prophet (PBUH) said,

“No child is born except on Al Fitra (Islam or primordial human nature) and then his parents make him Jewish, Christian or magician as an animal produces a perfect young animal: do you see any part of it’s body amputated?”

(Sahih Muslim)

This hadith states that Allah (SWT) has created children pure with the instinct to do good. A child does not have the intention of doing wrong, except that he/she is imitating the behaviours they are exposed to in their environment. It also emphasizes that it is the parenting that makes them grow up to individuals they will be.

Our children will become what we make of them. Insha ALLAH! So, when our child misbehaves instead responding harshly and letting emotions get the better of us, we can set a good example by staying calm and managing our emotions.

Regulating our emotions is not easy, it requires us to work on ourselves. Watch this space as we discuss how we can reach a place of peace so that we can respond to our children in the best possible way.

What do you do to stay calm and respond positively?

Share below and let us know.